Untamed · Journeys · in · Writing

Recently large demonstrations have taken place
across the country protesting the fact that Congress
is finally addressing the issue of illegal immigration.

Certain people are angry that
the US might protect its own
borders, might make it harder
to sneak into this countr y and,
once here, to stay indefinitely.

Let me see if I correctly understand
the thinking behind these protests.
Let's say I break into your house.
Let's say that when you discover
me in your house, you insist that I leave.
But I say, "I've made all
the beds and washed the
dishes and did the laundry
and swept the floors. I've
done all the things you don't
like to do. I'm hard-working
and honest
(except for when I broke into your house) .

According to the protesters:

You are Required to let me stay in your house
You are Required to add me to your family's insurance plan
You are Required to Educate my kids
You are Required to Provide other benefits to me & to my family

(my husband will do all of your yard work because
he is also hard-working and honest, except for that
breaking in part).

If you try to call the police or force me out,
I will call my friends who will picket your
house carrying signs that proclaim my
RIGHT to be there.

It's only fair, after all, because you have
a nicer house than I do, and I'm just
trying to better myself. I'm a hard-working
and honest, person, except for well,
you know, I did break into your house

And what a deal it is for me!!!

I live in your house, contributing only a
fraction of the cost of my keep, and
there is nothing you can do about it
without being accused of cold,
uncaring, selfish, prejudiced, and
bigoted behavior.

Oh yeah, I DEMAND that you learn
MY LANGUAGE!!! so you can
communicate with me.

Why can't people see how ridiculous
this is?! Only in America .
if you agree, pass it on ( in English ).
Share it if you see the value of it.

If not blow it off.........
along with your future Social Security
funds, and a lot of other things

Bullshit Bingo

Do you keep falling asleep in meetings and seminars? What about those long and boring conference calls? Here is a way to change all of that!

 

How to play: Check off each block when you hear these words during a meeting, or seminar,. When you get five blocks horizontally, vertically, or diagonally, stand up and shout BULLSHIT!!

 

Synergy	Strategic Fit	Gap Analysis	Best Practice	Bottom Line
Revisit	Bandwidth	Hardball	Out of the Loop	Benchmark
Value-Added	Proactive	Win-Win	Think Outside the Box	Fast Track
Result-Driven	Empower [or] Empowerment	Knowledge Base	Quality Driven	IN PUT
Mindset	Client Focus[ed]	Ball Park	Game Plan	Leverage

 

Testimonials from satisfied players:

"I had only been in the meeting for five minutes when I won."   -Jack W. - Boston

"My attention span at meetings has improved dramatically."   -David D. - Florida

"What a gas. Meetings will never be the same for me after my first win."   -Bill R - New York City

"The atmosphere was tense in the last process meeting as 14 of us waited for the 5^th  box." -Ben G. - Denver

"The speaker was stunned as eight of us screamed 'Bullshit' for the third time in 2 hours."   - Kathleen L. - Atlanta

 

She pulled off the masque. The masquerade party had been an experience no one could ever forget. Certainly not Ciria. Ciria had played an ugly stepsister for the day, but the day was now over, and she had to play herself now. Not that she minded any more, but it was odd. Before the party, it had excited her to get to be someone else for however long she could. But now, she looked in the mirror, happy to see her own face.
Ciria pondered why it was so exciting. Could it have been the masquerading Superman who had guessed her identity in the final contest? Or was it the prospect that being the ugly stepsister was losing her friends?
Unsure of why she was suddenly so happy with herself, she sat down to ponder the previous day. Time would go on, and soon she’d know.

The night was getting darker, and the road was getting longer when Zack pulled off the freeway. He stopped at a local WalMart, and found a spot to park his bike on the sidewalk by the front doors.

Getting lithely off the bike, Sarah didn't bother to ask why they were stopping. After they had put their helmets on the seat, Zack grabbed her hand and led her into the store, which was largely abandoned at this time of the evening.

They quickly found themselves enjoying conversation among the many different departments, looking at everything, but for nothing. They chased one another around the toy department with water guns, and admired various items in sporting goods.

"Look at this one!" Sarah exclaimed, pointing to a three room tent that was displayed in the center aisle.

"Nice," Zack said, "but a little big for a bike." At that, Sarah grinned, turning down a nearby aisle labeled "camping equipment."

"What about this one?" she asked, picking up a small two man tent.

"Great!" Zack said, taking it out of her hands. "Now to find a couple of sleeping bags or something." He started looking down one side, picking up random items, and putting them down again.

When they finally made it up to the registers, they had all the necessary equipment that they could fit on the back of his bike.

"So, where are we headed?" Sarah finally asked, as they finished strapping everything down. "You have any idea?"

"Well," he replied, "I was thinking that we might just go, you know. Wherever we want. You up for that?"

"Hell, yeah!" She put on her helmet, and climbed on the back of the bike. Off they went, in search of nothing more than the next place they would stop.

She held Zack's waist with a secret smile on her face, hoping that he was too busy driving to notice. It had been a long time since she had gotten to ride. Maybe he would think she was just happy to be out on the open road.

The truth, in fact, was something much different. She hadn't been riding since her roommate moved to New York. That much was true, but the reason she was smiling was much more personal than that. As a point of fact, it was Zack himself that caused her to smile so. He didn't know this, of course.

Happily, she sat astride the magnificent machine, watching the beautiful country side pass them by, and holding on to this man whom she had admired from afar for so long. It seemed like they had been riding forever, and she never wanted it to end. Of course it would, and they would have to go home eventually. But in the mean time, she was just going to enjoy herself, holding on to this man.

Neither of them knew where they were headed when they had taken off earlier that day. It had just been a whim that has caused him to say that he was going to go for a ride. In the excitement of the prospect, he had offered to let her ride along. She never thought he was being serious... just something that he was saying to be polite. Only because she happened to be there when he had come up with the idea. She had non-committally said she would love to go, expecting that he would drag around for a little while longer, then decide to go home instead.

It hadn't ended up that way, and Sarah couldn't help but feel the greatest of happiness about it. No matter that he didn't have the foggiest notion about how she really felt, she was getting to spend some time alone with him, and that was all that really mattered.

He turned his head and she saw that he was saying something. She leaned in to listen, and only barely caught him saying "something to eat?"

"Sure," she said into his ear.

There was a sign just there that pointed to a small town to the south, and he tokk the next turn toward that little town. It was only a matter of seconds, in her estimation, before they were stopping and she was climbing off the bike in the lot of a small restaraunt. She was reluctant to let go of the moment, but hunger was more important after the long drive.

"I think we have gone through about two counties at this point," Zack said. "If we keep going, we should be able to hit the state line in about an hour."

"Wow," she replied, "I hadn't realized we'd gone that far!"

They walked in total silence to the door, and he held it open for her. She thanked him, and they went inside to find a quaint little place. It was obviously family run. The plates of nearby patrons didn't match, and the coffee cups were all a little different. They were told to seat themselves, and they both stepped forward in the direction of the smoking section in back, where there were fewer people. Sarah looked around nervously, found the ladies room, and excused herself to wash her hands.

It wasn't that she was entirely nervous to be around him, after all they had hung out many times in the past. It was just that usually she had several other people there with her. She was afraid that something would show, that he would feel uncomfortable if he saw even a hint of how she felt. So far, she had managed to hide it. What would she do if he guessed?

She left the ladies room, still wiping her hands on her jeans.

"Out of paper towels. Oh, well, guess that's what jeans are for, huh?" She giggled as she sat down across from him.

**********

They spent the next hour at that table, talking about nothing at all. Topics from the state of economics in the country to the placement of exit ramps ran fleetingly around their table. Sarah noted that he seemed just as happy to sit there and talk as to get up and get back on the bike.

At some point, he started talking about her old roommate. Sarah wasn't clear where it had come from, but she was enjoying herself, and not about to let it deter her from that.

"Well, you know, we started off roommates, and we ended friends. It wasn't really a bad thing, you know?" She had dated the man for a few months prior to his move, but it had never become serious. They had their own rooms, and that line was never crossed. But she didn't understand why it would mean anything to Zack.

"You guys were good friends. I was just surprised that he up and left like that." Zack took a slow sip of his water, watching her as she formulated her response.

"Well, he had always wanted to go. He just felt that it was time." He had felt that she was in love with someone else, and didn't want to stand in her way. That was the truth. He left her as a friend, to move along with his life, and leave her to hers. She has thanked him for that.

"I just thought you guys were getting serious, is all." Zack was still watching her closely. It made her a little nervous, really. Her hands began to sweat, and she had the sudden urge to go wash them.

"Well, we just never had that much emotion invested in it," she said instead. Just sit here,she told herself. You'll give yourself away. "He and I knew both knew it. It was more like a convenience to hang out together, and that was really all there ever was to it."

"Now the way he looked at you, I would have thought different," Zack said, finally turning his head to look out the window at his bike.

"Well, if he harbored any feelings, he never told me," Sarah said, a bit on the startled side. Was he going to tell her that her old roommate was in love with her, and she should go to him? She didn't want to hear that, but she braced herself for it anyway.

"Okay, I'm sorry if I mistook it. I just wanted to know."

"Why?" she asked, before she could catch herself. Now, that was awefully sillly, Sarah, she chastised herself.

"Well, the truth is..." Zach said, after a long pause, "That I was kinda hoping you would say that. It's just that.... well, I was hoping that you would be interested in... " He paused again. He looked her right in eye this time, and the moment went on forever. Neither of them really noticed that he hadn't actually finished the statement. He had leaned in a little, and she leaned in as he spoke. The next thing she knew, she was living in a dream.

His lips were soft and gentle, and she felt that she could just fall into his arms, if it weren't for the table between them. He slowly reached his hand across the table and grasped her hand gently in his.

It seemed like mere seconds later that they were back on his bike again, driving toward the small downtown area that they had spied from the parking lot. Sarah was on cloud nine, and she felt that she would never come down again. They drove slowly through town, admiring the local architecture, talking again about nothing at all. It was so natural, she forgot all about how nervous she had been before.

Before they knew it, it was starting to get darker. They would have to head back soon, if they were going to be able to find their way home in the dark. But neither of them dared to mention it as they found a small country road that headed off to nowhere at all.

A few miles up that little country road, Zack slowed down a bit, turned his head, and said soemthing to her that made her smile all over again.

"I don't feel like going home yet. You?"

"No," she replied. And just like that, they were on the freeway, heading to who knew where.